I am particularly interested in the analogy with drugs.

People who have severe substance use disorders generally have experienced trauma, loss, abuse--a lot of it. They turn to drugs to escape the pain for a time.

Proper treatment of substance use disorder is thus trauma-informed. Good clinicians and their staff understand that there is a history of trauma and they offer compassion and they don't judge. They try to help family members learn to do the same. They help people understand that simply telling someone with these disorders not to use drugs, or attacking them for using drugs, is not a therapeutic or supportive approach.

I don't know if you have undergone therapy, or what type, but I am just wondering if your treatment has been, or could become, trauma-informed. I know there are trauma therapists, but I also wonder if a clinician who has experience treating substance use disorders, or "sex addiction" (Hypersexual Disorder (not in DSM)), could be helpful to you. I understand that those disorders are not exactly what you are dealing with, but the underlying concept--finding ways to escape the traumatic pain from the past--might resonate with them and make them helpful to you.