Oh no, I thought your alter was helping you out. So sorry sweetie, I know how very rough it all is. Please take care of yourself and keep talking. We're all here to listen. Need my shoulder to cry on. I'm happy to help out if I can. I hope you're not in this state too long. How long does it usually last for you and then what follows, a state of calmness or you back to star-tripping? Hugs sweetie.