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MissCharlotte said:
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We haven't shifted much at all and I am allowed to ask for anything. There are no boundaries surrounding what I am allowed to say or ask for. Of course, he is also allowed to respond as he wishes.

...His timing sucked though.

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I hope you didn't feel criticized - not my intention at all. I was trying to express that even though I, like you, am aware that my T is open to me asking for or saying, anything - I find myself unable to trust this completely all the time. I have to learn that he can and will take care of himself - I don't have to do that. And I have to learn (I'm really working on this) that I won't get "punished" for wanting something or even daring to ask for it. But I might not get it. And not getting it isn't a punishment, even if it feels like it sometimes.

And timing is everything in therapy, isn't it? Those moments of meeting are amazing. And the near-misses are scary. And when we out right bang into each other - ouch, ouch, ouch.

I think your observer is very wise to know you have to get reengaged in order to heal. And I think the other parts have extremely legitimate reasons to feel scared and hesitant. We call it "working through" because it there is labor involved and healing because there are painful wounds. And we hold onto the hope that it is all worth it in the end.