Thank you for the kind words and for sharing your truth. I understand you very well. When I left my husband, I was completely alone. He had the money and connections. It was frightening. It felt like jumping off the side of a cliff without a parachute. And there were certainly some very painful bumps along the way, but it was the right thing for me and I never look back.

My psychologist said it's very rare for anyone to leave a marriage in order to be alone (as opposed to via an affair) and I really beat the odds because I never went back to him. Though I have full compassion for women who leave/return/leave/return because abuse affects a person's decision-making processes and it is dangerous when women leave abusers. The first 6 months in particular. No sense sugar-coating it. That's why restraining orders and professional support are so important. I never called the police once while I was with him but as soon as I involved them when I left, he towed the line very quickly. Interesting how some men will treat their wives but would never dare try anything of the sort with another man....particularly one with a badge and a gun.

it makes me smile to think of your freedom and fresh start at 54, Eskielover. Well done for having the courage and resilience. Perhaps your post will inspire others!