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Lrad123
Poohbah
 
Member Since Nov 2017
Location: United States
Posts: 1,332
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Default May 03, 2019 at 08:33 AM
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Anne2.0 View Post
For me, there is a part of me, the kid who's skeptical anyone can and will really "show up" for her, who casts a suspicious eye on others and watches what they do rather than what they say. I tend to dismiss people who say they will or they want to be there for me.

This would mean a lot to me. Of course I'm sure he could have caught up on his paperwork or done other work if you didn't show. And it was brave of you to take the risk and learn that sometimes risk taking brings benefits in interpersonal relationships. What he did encourages you to continue to take risks in therapy and provides a kind of symbolic security that he'll be there.
Yes, I think this is exactly it. I’ve been skeptical all along. I’ve wondered if he’s smart enough, articulate enough or if I should have chosen someone who has published articles or books, etc. I’ve tried to find reasons to leave, but really what has mattered most is the way he behaves. It’s the emotional intelligence I need from him and not so much the academic intelligence. His behavior has been unwavering even when I’ve tested him. He’s allowed me to be difficult (which is a very new role for me) and he’s remained calm and consistent. His being there for me yesterday just fits right in with the way he’s been all along. I was his first patient at 7:00 am and very clearly notified him I wouldn’t be there. If I were him I would have taken the time to sleep in or go to the gym or something. Sure, he could come anyway and do paperwork, but not sure I would have done the same had our roles been reversed. It for sure added to the symbolic security that I experience with him in therapy.
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Thanks for this!
Anne2.0, LonesomeTonight, susannahsays