You risked a lot by turning up to a session which you had cancelled. I am not sure that your therapist has worked in your best long term interests by ignoring your cancellation. There is something about this playing-out which reminds me of your longing for his email responses. When he turned up for the session, he did the equivalent of replying to an email - it feels great! He cares enough to attend (answer the email)! But what about the next time you cancel and attend anyway? What if he isn't there? Or has booked to see another client because he has taken your cancellation seriously? I don't know, it seems messy to me.