Have you tried reading good engrossing novels instead of self-help books? Esp. novels whose plots revolve around affairs. You would be working through the challenges the protagonist is going through, except in your mind and not in real life, and that work of the mind will make you stronger and might also give you insight into why you on the one hand are willing to take crumbs and on the other hand are simply bored when considering, in your mind, the idea of involvement with a single guy.

A compelling riveting story in a good novel would occupy your mind - you will be grateful for that. Much better than taking drugs, whether physical or allegorical.