Quote:
Originally Posted by Omers
T and I have invited H to come any time he wants as jealously has been an issue from the start. I am trying to get H into marriage counseling but so far a no go. It is a lap pad or could be put over my shoulders so not a full blanket, I agree, that would be creepy. I have also asked H to meet some of the nurture needs that T is meeting and he has refused... obviously if T can do it then it isn’t something crazy intimate or complicated. But even simple stuff like holding me or even my hand when we talk is too much for H.
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I’m really sorry about your struggles with your husband. This helps to frame things better.
I think it’s awful that you have to ‘outsource’ your nurture needs. I’m glad your therapist is willing to do this until you can either get it from your husband (sounds unlikely), or find someone else who can step in someday.
My husband can be very jealous, but he is also extremely nurturing and loving. For this reason, I tend to give jealous husbands the benefit of the doubt. Sounds like more benefit than yours should be given, based on his withholding and inflexibility to change.