I did ok last night and didn’t self harm. Writing about it helped. I also did something I shouldn’t have so that I could avoid thinking about anything. 2.5 mg of klonopin and 2.5 mg of Xanax. Would have taken more if I had it. I guess this was an attempt to avoid instead of dealing with it, but when the thoughts are racing and you’re hurting, you do what you have to do.

Thank you all for your supportive words.