Quote:
|
I have a hard time telling the difference. I often feel depressed but the online tests indicate sadness instead. There are certain factors that define depression that I never experience. Primarily being a burden.
|
First, online tests are not meant as a diagnostic tool - so if you think you may be suffering depression, best thing to do is get a professional evaluation.
Being a burden is not so much of a defining characteristic that it is "make or break". Generally, I don't feel like I am a burden until just before I start getting suicidal ideation - but depression begins well before then.
Some of the larger characteristics include: feeling sad most to all the time, isolating oneself, feeling you do not belong or are unwanted, crying for no particular reason, lack of energy, tired or sleeping most to all the time, decline in effort to keep up with daily chores or self maintenance. Those are more tell-tale of the start of depression n even then you don't need to have ALL the symptoms.
Quote:
|
As I ponder this, I'm becoming more aware of another driving force - feeling displaced. I tend to be an idealist, believing in a quasi-utopian society. This world of ours is far from that. I'm a huge fan of Star Trek because of the vision behind it - that humanity finally got past the petty differences and learned to get along. The past few nights I've been watching some of my favorite episodes and just feel a profound sense of displacement. I belong out there, not here.
|
I think all of us would enjoy a more utopian environment - but just as you, we recognize it is not possible. Here's a question for you: Do you ever blame yourself for the world not being more utopian? (Not saying you should - it's another question pertaining to this subject.)
Quote:
|
I grew up feeling like I was an alien. I've come to learn that a lot of it has to do with being an HSP (Highly Sensitive Person). US society in particular values men who are not emotional. Men who "suck it up." Men who are independent. I don't fit what society believes a man should be.
|
I agree society has a lot of unfair ideas about both men and women. Being different from those ideas is not wrong nor does it make you a misfit. It makes you your own person. An individual deserving of love and respect. May I ask how it was your parents causes you to feel like an alien? I too am a HSP. I have done studies, and found many HSP who were also abused as children, later wound up BPD (I, myself have). Do you know what that is? Do you know if that is something that affects you?