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Blackice1993 · May 05, 2019 at 08:29 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Dee99

This is my first time on this site, and first time posting a thread so my apologies if I do anything wrong.

But, I have been having suicidal thoughts/unhealthy behaviors since I was around 11. I am 20 now, and am still having the same issues.
I was homeschooled my whole life, in a small town, with a very tiny family. Because of this, I did not have any friends and didn't socialize unless I had to. I didn't have birthday parties, I rarely took trips with my mom, sister, and somewhat emotionally abusive father.

My most common issues are feelings of worthlessness, loneliness, feeling undeserving, and as if no matter what I do I'll never be happy.
I guess what I'm really trying to ask, is if anyone else has had these issues, or knows how I can cope with them.
I apologize for my long rambling story, I thought maybe some details would help.

You mentioned that your father was somewhat emotionally abusive, so the possibility is there. The feelings you have sound like the feelings someone would have if their feelings weren't validated enough as a child i.e unmet emotional needs. Were you by any chance criticized a lot? If you were upset, did your parents listen to you? Or did they simply remain quiet most of the time?