I think you have to be happy with you before anyone else can. People learn from us how to treat us.

I would get some therapy for your issues and work on self esteem and enjoying yourself, whatever your weight (I'm currently 260) and see how changes of that sort in yourself maybe get him feeling more comfortable and glad to be with you. My husband could care less about my weight (he's overweight too) that's not "me" as you have pointed out. But I know who I am and it sounds like you are struggling to understand who you are and how you "fit" with yourself. You don't need fixing, you're not broken. You need loving and enjoying, first by yourself and then by others.