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Originally Posted by AB2371
narcissistic behaviors and narcissistic personality disorder plague majority of my support system. not only do they see no other way but their own, they are unwilling to see different ways of achieving what they want. I'm not a complete narc, (although I do see the need to maintain a healthy level of narcissistic qualities), but my need to have control over myself reaches far beyond my need to control others. and, my most fear breaking truth is, if it is meant to be, it will be. there are some fates that can not be altered or achieved despite what is thrown to wolves. one of my least favorite personality traits is a manipulator; someone who needs to control to feel in control is such a waste of positive leadership. and, at times, this kind of behavior is too trying for me to feel like myself, and so now I have learned that removing yourself from the narcissistic hold is the only way deal with narcissism.
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You are so right. I noticed my ex-friend posted likes on my Facebook this morning. This is manipulation. I told her I didn't want to email anymore so she goes to Facebook. I also feel that there is a lot of narcissism in our society...and even in the mental health recovery community. For instance, sometimes one can call a Crisis Hotline and the crisis counselor will actually sound angry if their suggestions aren't accepted. That's happened to me. In graduate school (I went back in mid-life) I think about 98% of the professors were out-of-control narcissists. Like they would give you an A- on a paper and spend half a page detailing why a minus was deserved. I used to go nuts! Some of the criticism was constructive but on the whole it was power mongering plain and simple. Higher academia is rife with narcissism.
It's going to take a lot of strength to stay NO CONTACT but I am prepared for the battle.
I agree that sometimes one feels the need to fight fire with fire. Sometimes I pretend I am Sherlock Holmes! I get very cold and calculating. I HAVE to do this to stay out of the emotional muddle created by narcissists. Sherlock Holmes needed a clean mind to solve crimes. We need a clean mind to solve narcissistic crimes.
Are you really narcissistic? The one thing narcissists cannot do...is put themselves in another's shoes. Anyone who comes on Psych Central is trying to feel another's pain so in that way I think there is very little narcissism on this site.
