I think I technically was in therapy as part of family therapy when I was quite young, maybe five or six. Probably due to my family having problems like my parents often fighting. Yet, really not sure what came of that.

At 15 I developed anorexia and ended up hospitalized. I had a pdoc and therapist inpatient who I saw a few times. I didn't want medication as my pdoc tried to insist I needed an antidepressant, but I didn't feel depressed, just like I was wrapped up in the eating disorder and it was like a compulsion. I had a therapist for maybe 3-6 months after that, but it just wasn't that helpful and in fact made me feel worse. At some point she had to have surgery and suggested it would be a good time to take a break and see how I did. I never went back. Over the next few years I slowly recovered from the eating disorder, although it was very difficult without help.

I continued to deal with depression, especially seasonally and around my period, as well as anxiety.

I went to a pdoc when I was about 26 because I felt I was having memory and attention type issues. I was put on adderall and it helped but made me irritable. I took it for maybe 4-6 months then stopped and did not go back.

When I was 30 I started seeing a therapist at my university's mental health center because my anxiety was through the roof, and I was having obsessive thoughts, and some other concerning thoughts. Prior to that I had never felt suicidal. I only got 7 sessions with her and after a couple heard about a clinical trial for depression and decided to join it because they would give me CBT or Lexapro. I stopped seeing the university therapist and did the trial. I was told I had MDD and GAD. I was randomized to Lexapro in the trail, and tried that for 6 weeks and it made me quite unwell, mixed I guess. I at least had a reaction to it. I had the CBT portion added in after 6 weeks, but they had to pull me out of the trial to try other medication. Lamictal also didn't help, and in the end I was more stable off meds. I was diagnosed bipolar unspecified, and told I also seem to have OCD. I am now just seeing a therapist and can go back to the pdoc as needed.As I mentioned recently in another post, I think I need neuropsych testing or something because of my memory issues.