I'm so sorry I didn't read this earlier, BirdDancer! I'm so sorry you're going through all of this! How are things going for you right now? I hope you're feeling a bit better! I agree with what all the other wise, wonderful posters have already wisely said better than I ever could! Please DO remember that you're not alone and that YOU ARE LOVED HERE! I PROMISE YOU THAT! PLEASE REMEMBER ALL OF THAT BECAUSE IT IS TRUE! Let us know if there's ANYTHING AT ALL that we can do to HELP YOU OUT, ok? You DO desevre to be loved and to be helped! Be proud of yourself because you're taking all the necessary steps to get better! It's not easy, but YOU'RE DOING IT! YOU'RE TRYING YOUR BEST and THAT'S WHAT MATTERS! Be proud of yourself, ok,BirdDancer, my friend? You WILL get through all of this because YOU'RE STRONG AND YOU KNOW THAT, BIRDDANCER! Take GREAT care of yourself, BirdDancer, my friend, and remember that we'll NEVER abandon you! I PROMISE YOU ALL FO THAT! PLEASE REMEMBER ALL OF THAT BECAUSE IT IS TRUE! I'm so sorry that you're going through all of this! Please keep us updated as much as you possibly CAN if you want to, ok? We DO want to know how things are gong for you and if things are getting ANY better and if there's ANYTHING, ANYTHING AT ALL that we can do to HELP YOU OUT! Sending many hugs to you, BirdDancer!