Quote:
Originally Posted by ShadowGX
I mean, I'd dump a dude for that crap, no doubt about it. No one yells at me like that and gets away with it. Period. I dealt with enough abuse and controlling behavior from my parents, I will not tolerate it from a mate.
You said "I know talking to him about it will do jack ****." If you truly believe that's the case, end it. If you think there's any hope, which I think you do or you wouldn't post this, then calmly ask if you can have a serious discussion with him. Don't approach it in an accusatory way, use "I" statements, like "I feel badly when you do this and that for this reason". If he can't handle having an calm adult discussion then it doesn't sound like a good long term relationship to go into.
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I tried talking to him on Saturday about it and he laughed at how it's "still an issue." So I guess problems suddenly disappear if he no longer considers something a problem. He didn't apologize, either, so I was pretty much right that talking about it to him would do jack ****.
He agrees that he "says stupid things" but he didn't really show remorse, I think, for it. I mean, we all say stupid things. I've never invalidated him the same way he does to me, though. Then again I'm not sure he even knows what it feels like to be invalidated. I grew up in a narcissistic family and my feelings have NEVER been validated so I've been forcefully living with that feeling.
We've been together for 7 years btw.