My relationship with my husband is not good. I probably should have ended it a long time ago but I have very little self esteem and I also did not want to be single. I love him, but lately I can’t stand him. We have 3 small children together with complicates everything. I do not want my children to grow up with us separated (yeah yeah I know often it’s better-I don’t want to hear that). When I have gone through break ups before they devastate me completely. It takes me ages to get over it. I end up angry, so damn angry. I end up hating the person, or wanting them back.

I guess I want to start preparing for it. If he ended out relationship tomorrow I would lose it. I’d be a disaster. If he moved on with someone else the anger I’d feel would be all consuming. So how do I do that. How do I start separating myself from him? BPD just complicates everything.