Why relationships with repeated hovering? It takes quite a lot to cross my boundaries. The friendship was good for me even though she’d take jabs veiled as humor. When that got to be too much for me, I distanced myself. Then she’d call again and I’d give her another chance, thinking she’d changed. She wouldn’t take he jabs for a while, instead love bomb, but then the jabs would start again. So I’d distance again. I suppose the answer is I have sketchy boundaries.

Has this been the pattern over time with your friend?

Also, I don’t think she was just an abuser who did not genuinely love me. Rather, I think she was so deeply jealous of me. She really loved me but hated herself. The jabs were to take me down so she could feel better about herself. It sure does hurt, though, that she loved me, but not enough to simply apologize and respect me in order to stay my friend.

And yes, this is a pattern for me with others in my life, too.