Quote:
Originally Posted by resurgam
block her. delete the contacts. if you are going to end it, end it. don't play the game to see what she is goin g to do. if the friendship is truly over then just end it. I think that by leaving it half open & checking on it you are doing yourself no favors and are playing right into it just as much as she is...
if you really don't want any contact why would you leave it so you can see contact? who cares what people say, it is none of their business. anyone asks say we are no longer friends, etc. period.
regardless of how long the friendship has been if it is over, it is over. talk the talk, walk the walk...otherwise the drama will continue.
|
I don't agree with this at all. I am not deleting her on Facebook because frankly I rarely use Facebook. I only keep my account up for business purposes. I don't put personal stuff on my timeline. She rarely posts. As a rule I don't block or delete on Facebook. I hate Facebook and rarely even check it.
You can't stop the mail. She can send me stuff in the mail.
This idea of
physical NO CONTACT only --- entirely misses the point.
It is more an emotional thing. If you don't put out thought energy to them...they can actually feel that loss of energy.
I am tired of this discussion about what No Contact means. And walk the walk and all that.
And...for the record...it is best to avoid damage from the narcissist.
I once was involved in a romantic relationship that became dangerous and toxic. I used the "grey rock" technique and in worked. I didn't have to change my phone number, get a restraining order, buy a gun etc.
I just went grey rock. I didn't do anything. I was stalked for a bit then finally...it stopped.
So I think that is the best technique. Doing all that crap of deleting contacts etc. is really just playing into the drama.
Okay, yeah, that's what I think.
Also...there is a certain sadness and grief. Playing "tough" with someone and telling them to "walk the walk" is unduly harsh and unneeded. Thanks anyway for your comment and concern.
I think Golden Eve made the best comment...to practice self-care, positivity, and take the spotlight off them and onto my life.