"I am home schooled, practically have no friends, living in a Thailand in a very local suburban area, have no options near me in terms of clubs and stuff (I do go to BJJ classes, but it's adult classes). None of my family knows, my extended families aren't an option either."

I just read this post. The level of isolation you live with is enough to trigger some depression. I know that you don't feel that you can talk to a friend or family member....what is healthcare like where you are....can you speak with a local doctor? I think that's a safe place to start.

And of course talk to us as much as you like to