There is one main point that I want to make.....YOU EARNED THIS....
You left the safety zone of his care and you spent untold hours thinking, writing and trying to figure out what had happened and what you could do. This is called "Helping Yourself, & Finding Resources Within Yourself". I cannot tell you how proud I am of you. You didn't have H. to turn to or much of anything except what you already possessed.....the desire to be better and stronger and to understand how to go about it tapping into those. I know your t. has to be sooo proud of you fluff.

I am so relieved for you that you have talked this thru and now understand that he was never withdrawing from you. You know have his support, strength and safety. You also have the knowledge that you may have a lot more internal resources than you imagined.

love, tulips