[QUOTE=StreetcarBlanche;6532213]Thank you ennie.

I feel like you - DechanDawa- are giving your narcissist friend mixed messages by not being straightforward with her. That could come back to bite you in the end and cause you more emotional grief and pain than you deserve.

The rule of thumb with people is to always be direct with them, so they know what to expect from you. Even if they don't like the boundaries you put up, too bad. Those boundaries are for your own protection, DechanDawa.

It's hard to stand up to a friend you've known your whole life. But if you want her around, then you need to accept her for the way she treats you. If you don't accept her mistreatment of you, you owe it to yourself to hold her accountable. Otherwise if you don't hold her accountable, she'll think it's ok to continue to hurt you and mistreat you b/c you never speak up for yourself. I know it can be scary to confront someone who has a strong personality, but it comes down to who matters more to you: your toxic friend's feelings, or your own?[/QUOTE



Thanks for the advice which I am sure you are giving in good faith.

I have used the grey rock technique before effectively.

I believe...in the end...it has to do with psychic energy.

I have been friends with this person for 50 years, practically since infancy. We communicate through energetic channels. It was the kind of friendship...where...just thinking about her would cause her to call me.

The point here that everyone is missing is about Facebook, social media, etc. being the most important consideration.

Believe me this person has countless ways of hoovering. We grew up in the same community and know hundreds of the same people. Long before Facebook there were other ways people communicated socially. Some are still in effect in small towns.

I want to minimize damage. I don't want every cousin of mine knowing my business.

So, yes, I am stepping lightly around this.

As I have said before...in other threads...my best advice came from Golden Eve. If we strengthen our own lives and introduce a lot of positivity...demons will naturally fall away because there will be no energy, psychic or otherwise, to feed off.

We become codependent to narcissists because there are weakness in our own life...such as...imbalances, substance abuse, lack of confidence and self esteem.

In truth...and this has been after a lot of soul searching...I can see where this situation has nothing to do with the "other" and is more a wake up call about my own life.

PS You were involved in blocking, unblocking and then blocking a narcissist on your Facebook. This was feeding their energy. If you had applied the grey rock technique you could have psychically cut off the energetic connection with this person. You can find information on the grey rock technique online. Esteemology is a very good site on recovery from narcissistic abuse.