Quote:
Originally Posted by TishaBuv
Of course, take care of yourself. Golden Eve said that, maybe on another thread.
With my sister, I deeply want her to care for me and feel bad for having hurt me. She’s obviously not going to. I didn’t officially end anything. Just really, none of them care.
You may want to look at the whole relationship with your friend. Has she been very hurtful time and again? Is this something that can be repaired?
With my friend that I no longer speak to, she was very toxic for a long time and there was no repairing it. She refused to have any respect for me. I had to block her because she was harassing me with texts. Then she never called again to apologize because she also truly didn’t care.
This may or may not be the case with your friend.
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My friend is "covert" which means she is mostly very nice. Her manipulation is...in the form of interfering and giving unsolicited advice and treating me like a victim of life...which I am not. Of course, she never apologizes.
I sympathize with you regarding your sister. My sister was out-of-touch with me for several years (cruelly) then she became terminally ill. Suddenly she was back in touch and insisted on a big family reunion (of adult siblings) before she died. It was horrific! I tried to get out of it but my niece called me and practically threatened me...to insist I show up. She even paid for my travel expenses which because of distance were quite expensive. This required me to interface with several other toxic members of my family.
My sister did not change -- even up into the end. Gave me nothing. Nothing. It was so painful. There she was...near death and on palliative chemo...chain-smoking (My God) and drinking coffee...and spouting off her usual crap. And I thought, "My God...even on death's door they don't change." During this time I was being bullied by other toxic siblings who showed up.
It sounds like I didn't love my sister. I did. But in the end...she gave nothing. Nothing. She just drifted off on the waves of her own lifelong self-absorption.
Try to detach from your sister a bit. It's not worth it to be hurt by someone who simply...doesn't care.