[QUOTE=StreetcarBlanche;6532488]
Quote:
Originally Posted by DechanDawa
Well, I live by the rule of thumb that to keep my power, I have to block the person from my life. Sure, he could easily "friend" my friends on Facebook if he wants to, to get access to me that way (so he can trash talk me to my friends). But I'm not worried because I have more faith in my friends' loyalty to me and protecting me from him.
I'm a very intuitive person so I can respect that psychic connection that you have with this friend whom you've known for 50 years. I also suspect you don't want to deal with the fallout, of the hundreds of mutual friendships and acquaintances who would become aware that you and your friend disconnected.
It's par for the course, however, when you disconnect from a toxic person that there will be interpersonal fallout, whether it's on a familial or workplace, or social level. You can't just end a friendship and not have the world know about it. Someone in your mutual social circles will find out. But, that is inevitable.
I'm not going to let the narcissist stay friends with me on Facebook. I will never unblock him again. I blocked him from my cellphone number and email address. I don't care about his feelings. I don't care if he feels satisfaction that I blocked him. I have my power back, by blocking him. If I left him on my Facebook page, he would still have access to me and I won't let that happen.
I read about the grey-rock method of not reacting to narcissists. The articles I read, suggest a combination of using the grey rock method and blocking the narcissist from all social media, email and cellphones. The fact that the narcissist tried to hook me with "What happened?" as soon as I unblocked him from my Facebook, shows me that it wasn't safe for me to keep him even hidden on my Facebook page b/c he'd still have access to my life.
I don't care if he tries to trash talk me to our mutual acquaintances or tries to ruin my reputation. The people who know me, who like me, won't let him do that. And the people who don't know me, who like him, will believe him. Either way, I've cut off access to him by blocking him, so I'm feeling confident I won't have to ever deal with him again, even on a psychic level anymore.
I wish you the best of luck with your friend of 50 years. I also follow Buddhism and believe every living thing is connected on a metaphysical level. But, that doesn't mean we are required to compassionately stay connected to a source of toxicity -- esp. if that source is a person who is out to harm us.
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Wait a minute. Did you unfriend that person on FB? Is that the same as blocking? I mean if you...yeah, unfriend someone and block them then they are gone. I am not sure why you went on and on about this person here. You keep talking about him. You see, energetically you have not let go. It seems like maybe you should delete your FB account altogether as it appears to be a source of problems for you.
Buddhist metaphysics teaches interconnectedness. It is simply a FACT that we are all interconnected. Truly the only way to heal...from the Buddhist perspective...is to extend compassion. Buddhists always extend compassion even to their enemies.
But I was not talking about Buddhist practice but rather Buddhist metaphysics. In truth the teachings on Buddhism can be pretty unrealistic in real life. Buddhism is not a very self-protective religion and historically has not respected women's rights.
I want to avoid drama while disconnecting from my friend. I don't want to stir up a big hornet's nest of vindictiveness. So in that respect I am a bit Buddhist, I guess, though mostly lapsed.
I believe Grey Rock Technique can be applied energetically. I had a situation of a very abusive relationship ending and a bit of stalking. People advised me to get a restraining order, change my number, change the locks on my door, buy a gun etc. Finally...I did nothing.
Absolutely nothing. I didn't change my number or do any of that other stuff. I simply applied a Grey Rock mentality. I just moved on with my life.
I applied Grey Rock by detaching from all the relationship drama and went on with my life...and it worked. The person eventually just faded away.
It was much more peaceful than a lot of the drama everyone else was suggesting.