Hello Niceguy: I noticed this is your first post here on PC. So... welcome to Psych Central. I'm sorry I don't think I can be of help with regard to what is going on with you. We here on PC are not able to offer mental health diagnoses.

It does sound, from what you wrote, that you're struggling with a significant amount of anxiety. But you already know that. Anything beyond that I'm afraid you would need to take up with a mental health professional where you live. And then, of course, it's always worthwhile to have yourself checked out medically too just to rule out any possible medical conditions.

Since you mentioned intrusive thoughts though here are links to 3 articles, from Psych Central's archives, on that subject:

How You Can Overcome Intrusive Thoughts | Dialectical Behavior Therapy Understood

9 Ways to Let Go of Stuck Thoughts

Coping with Obsessive Thoughts

I hope you find PC to be of benefit.