Quote:
Originally Posted by StreetcarBlanche
This is your chance to stop being rigid and to work with the circumstances you've been thrown by these friends of your partners. Stop wasting time arguing about the stupid times and start problem solving how to deal with your son's separation anxiety that you've done before. Or you are setting yourself and your family system up for a totally un-necessary negative outcome b/c you refuse to let go of your rigid expectations which is causing you, your partner, and your son grief that doesn't need to be.
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You seem to have assumed that I haven't already gone over and over and over this and tried to find other solutions.
What helps my son is strong physical input- strong hugs, physically mucking around, jumping on a trampoline, swinging, all things I am physically unable to do or that we do not have the space for because we live in an apartment with no parks close by (they've been doing a huge rebuild for months now).
Beyond that, what helps is giving him as much information as possible so that he knows what to expect and when.
Given all physical options are out that only leaves routine.
Do you think it's fun having to push to get basic information (again, information they've had no issue giving to others)?
I WANT my partner to go to this wedding, it's his best friend!
I HATE that we have no help or support and that that's making this whole damn thing incredibly difficult.
I HATE that I even have to think about all of this but this I do.
We've done as much work as we can around son's separation anxiety with me and he no longer has meltdowns when I'm out.
Partner won't go and do things with his friends (he's frequently used son and I as an excuse to not catch up with friends) so we have no chance to work on his separation anxiety with partner, which means son still has meltdowns when separated from him.
So I've got to wonder what exactly you think I should do that doesn't put myself and my son at risk?