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It’s interesting that some on PC have said that because this topic keeps coming up, there may be something important there and I should talk to him about it, yet others have said it seems like a distraction and I should move away from it. They both make sense to me. I wonder which it is?
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I think it's both. I would agree that the email issue seems like it must be the tip of an iceberg. Right now it seems like you get frustrated over the email issue without looking below the surface of it, so it is a distraction. At the same time, if you really examine the email issue, maybe you'll start to see the iceberg.
I also wonder whether it might be worth trying to take your desire for email contact and transfer it to your family or friends. It probably depends on why you're emailing, but I'm guessing on some level there's a desire for closeness or attention that you could at least partly fulfill elsewhere, and in a way that might ultimately strengthen those other relationships.