Quote:
Originally Posted by Forgetmenot07
Thanks, I don't find any of it offensive and I understand the conversation will diverge in such a long thread. I am indifferent to the prositute analogy as I don't see it this way but am in no way upset by it either.
If I could change the title it wouldn't be so negative and 'angry'. As I said before I am still in therapy and don't plan to leave.. There is just an aspect of it that I find very frustrating and disappointing. Reading through those replies made me realise that my experience is more common than I expected and validated my feelings. The neediness came with a lot of shame and confusion. The key, at least for me, is to accept the limitations and make a consious decision whether I want to continue in therapy or try elsewhere. But this was not easy to comprehand when I was enmashed in the experience.
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It might be useful to do a sort of cost/benefit assessment then. Is the benefit (or potential benefit) of therapy worth the discomfort coming with how it is administered? Is this discomfort causing you disruptions in daily life, including making your problems worse or more difficult to handle? Or is it something that can be tolerated, much like the side effects of a medication that is otherwise helpful? Can you consciously regulate your expectations such that you can accept this is just a professional service (which it is) and not view it as some kind of closeness? Is your T one of those that like to focus on using your relationship for exploration - if yes, maybe tell them that you don't want to work that way. Also, if you have this dependency because you don't have other sources or social support and validation, maybe work on having more of that from ordinary relationships.
Also, on your other thread you mention that your T thinks you are not showing enough emotions in sessions, but it sounds like you feel quite intensely. Maybe bring that up, especially if the enmeshment is because otherwise you feel isolated, lonely and without support.