Good to hear that you and your wife talked with each other about this issue.

She needs to accept that only SHE is responsible for her own happiness. Not you. Not her therapists, or job counselors, or friends, or pets, etc., only SHE is. No one else can make her happy -- that's just not possible. Only she can make herself happy. Somehow, she has to come to this realization, or she will continue to seek happiness outside of herself.

Please find a way to make yourself happy while your wife goes through this experience. The best way I can relate to your situation, is that I have to take care of my mother who has dementia. And, I have NO support system -- my friends have stopped contacting me to get together, b/c what I'm doing makes them uncomfortable.

So, I'm learning that the only way I'm going to survive living with my mother until a bed opens up in an assisted living facility that I've applied her to, is to seek out ways to make myself happy. I found some support groups of adult children with dementia parents, that I will attend.

I also rejoined Meetup, and am in grad school again, and am looking for a full-time job and a place to live. All of these things distract me from the stress and unhappiness that comes with parenting my mother whose dementia grows exponentially worse daily.

Whatever happiness looks like to you -- hanging out with your buddies, joining community sports leagues, monthly poker games, whatever the activities are, try to find a way to rejoin those and be with the guys who make you happy, as your buddies. You need to make time for yourself, somehow, someway.