No one here did this to themself.
Though it's true we seek what we need, the problems happen when the therapist doesn't know how to recognize and manage their own transferences and then engage with your patterns. Outside of therapy, you might expect it, but not with therapists. They are supposed to recognize these dynamics and deal with them appropriately before the consequences become catostrophic.
It's not the client's fault. I realize you have your own perspective, but it's sad to see some you blaming yourself.