Hi, my dad died two months ago. I’m having a very hard time coping. Partly because my sister and stepmother live out of state and I am here alone. I have some friends but don’t feel like I can be real with them. My boyfriend has been doing nothing but fighting with me and telling me everything I do is wrong since my dad died. He said he is my rock but broke up with me 4 times and then came back and said he’s sorry and how much he loves me. I. Can’t take it anymore. All the fighting really got to me and I was so stressed about my dad and I finally decided to cut to feel better and I did. Then yesterday my boyfriend told me I had ruined our relationship by asking to spend Saturday with my friends. He was mad it was a holiday weekend and I’ve been gone a lot due to my dad’s death (I went out of town for two weeks to visit my sister and stepmother). He wen on and on and finally I couldn’t take it and I started throwing stuff (I haven’t thrown stuff in years) and I went in the bathroom and cut my leg. He came in and caught me and helped me bandage it. Then today he apologized for fighting and said it was all his fault even though yesterday he was being verbally abusive and telling me everything is my fault and I am responsible for everything. Then he called and had a problem with me again and I cut again. I need to get out of this cycle. I know I need to get away from my boyfriend. I didn’t describe everything but he is verbally abusive. Since my dad died 3/24 he broke up with me 5 times then came back and said how much he loves me and wants me. It’s too much. I cut to feel better and to relieve my stress. It had been years but losing my dad and having this boyfriend drama sent me over the edge. I hate it because i Know I’ll have scars. I feel maybe I should check into the hospital. I’m afraid I’ll keep cutting and I just feel so bad and depressed. I don’t know how to get through my days. My boyfriend has made the whole time since my dad died much worse than it would have been. What do I do? Go to the hospital? Break up with my boyfriend? Get out of this state and move in with my sister? What do I do?