Peanut said it all. You are in a temporary condition. Depression is a process; it takes time and events to get there and likewise to get out. You will get out of it. Find a professional to help you out. Call the suicide hot line or 911. Stay in touch here. Post frequently, as you can, with what is on your mind. It really does help.
Bumper sticker: Wherever you go, there you are
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"...even the truth, when believed, is a lie. You must experience the truth, not believe it." Werner Erhard
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