According to PsychCentral, this is the description and symptoms of Avoidant Personality Disorder:

Avoidant Personality Disorder

It does not include any kind of hostility or prickliness. Basically it is a desire to have interpersonal relationships but a fear so strong of the rejection or other pain those relationships can bring, the person ends up pushing away any opportunity for an interpersonal relationship .. as well as focuses on all the ways they find themselves to be inadequate and typically don't see much reason for people to like them - while finding a lot of good in other people. That's boiling it way down and reading the link will likely be better, but I don't see anything truly negative in the description.. rather it sounds more like a self-defeating type of thing - where you consistently beat yourself up for most everything .. and praise others ... yearn for friendships but convince yourself you are undeserving or they simply will not work, etc.

*hugs*

If you don't mind sharing - what is causing you to feel you are in a cage?