Hello missjamie3812

sorry you are struggling with this. It's a very common attachment issue. Are you open to speaking with a therapist? You could certainly do some reading on the topic but I think it would be more effective for you to work through it with an experienced professional. They are very familiar with attachment concerns; they know what to do.

As a thought exercise, I recommend breaking down this observation about yourself:
But I tend to think of them 24/7 at first and freak out if they don’t text me all the time. I end up spending way too much time thinking about them and worrying that they don’t like me.

Ask yourself, if this man never contacts me again, what would that mean to me? Very specifically. What would the thought or feeling be that I am hoping will not happen?

What if the man "does not like" you? Again...add to that idea....try completing the sentence.: "I am worried that this man will not like me because if he does not like me I will think ___________ or feel ______________"

At some point it will be helpful to consider the men you choose and any patterns but I think first it's good to just start with yourself from scratch. You are dealing with anxiety in these situations right? Anxiety is basically a modern word for fear. So perhaps the most important question is:
What am I afraid of?

When you have that answer, you have your guide for where to start. Though generally I think that's much easier to do and more effective with help from a therapist.

And there are wonderful guided meditations on YouTube to help take the edge off your anxiety in the meantime. You may also want to ask yourself if dating is what you truly want to do right now given the level of anxiety it triggers. Taking a break while you build up your self-esteem doesn't hurt but that is your choice. Only you can answer that.

Peace, hope, and a bright future to you