Good to hear from you again, Rachelle.

“I don't think he will initiate more kisses. He will hug me, yes. I know since in the past I twice emailed him to ask him not to hug me anymore. In the session that followed he gave me several full body hugs, so it didn't impress him I guess . I don't think he will kiss me again if I don't initiate a hug myself. This last encounter I was in so much despair he wanted to abandon me that I held his hands and hugged him around his neck out of despair. I think that made him think I felt attracted to him and initiate the kisses, and I don't believe he would repeat that if I would not hug him myself. It is just this darn transference makes me dream about his hugs and kisses, and that is what I need to stop somehow instantly.”

He has created boundaries for you... about outside contact, when he will see you, when he will not.

Can you make boundaries of your own for him such as, “No, you may not kiss me. No, I don’t feel comfortable hugging anymore, etc.” ?

He does *not* hold all of the power. You have immense power. For example, You can fire him. You can refuse treatment. You can refuse intimacies. You can report him. You can say, ‘no,’ and not accept anything less.

Creating healthy boundaries for myself is one of the most important lessons that the exploitation and rape taught me... Creating healthy boundaries is a process for me. Sometimes I’m better at it than other times.

I wish previous therapists had taught me about healthy boundaries years and years ago. It would have saved me a lot of pain.

Perhaps this is where you begin to look into creating healthy boundaries for yourself.