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Originally Posted by toomanycats
Thank you - I do have another question...
Does integration come with a recollection of all of your "big" memories? Or, are some things just lost forever? For example, there are significant people from my past who I do not recall at all & only know they exist because family told me about them years later ...nor am I aware of any Part/alt that recalls them, though the prevailing theory is that someone, somewhere deep in there likely does, but I have zero access to that Part. Does integration come with remembering such significant things/people, or might one achieve integration and still have amnesia?
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memories are individualized by that I mean if you and I did the same event what you remember of that event may turn out to be different than my memory of the event... why because I am not you and you are not me. you and your brain will remember things as how ever you and your brain remembers things and mine will remember what and how it remembers.
let me show you an example...
if you had a room full of people an apple and tell them to eat it. then ask everyone in the room what they remember about the apple...
one may say how it felt in their hands, another may say they remember the smell, another may say they remember the crunch, and others may say the taste.
each one of these people remember what is important to them at the time they ate the apple and how it applies to their individual body and life.
my point is I cant tell you whether you will remember and how inside you. I can tell you that I now have what memories that were dissociatively stored in each of my alters according to how my brain remembers people/ places/ things.
and what I cant remember I dont dwell on that, why because it is normal for humans to not remember every last detail and person/ place and thing in their lives. Ask any non mentally physically challenged person if they remember every single detail of their lives including all the people they have encountered in their lives and the answer will be of course not.
most poeple only remember a portion of their relatives from their past and childhood. thats why there is things like photos, documents like family trees in bibles and other books, family tree documents on their walls, in museums and so forth. its a way to remember family members and connections to them.
my suggestion maybe you can talk with various family members who can share with you photos and interesting family stories so that you can make photo albums and family tree's. maybe you can contact your family church, many churches have murals and family tree documentations as part of their members that have attended those churches.
you can also do internet searches on your ancestry.
my point theres many ways that you can find connections to those family and friends from the past, whether or not you end up gaining back the memories about them.
and remember its completely normal not to remember everything so its normal to have memory gaps. what makes it a dissociative memory problem is that it goes beyond the normal forgetfulness...