Thanks for saying that. I'm glad it's inspiring to read, and I relate so strongly to what you're saying about how therapy has turned out to be about completely different things than you initially thought. I didn't even think I was looking for a therapist when I first saw my current one, just a psychiatrist for medication. Multiple times (maybe 4 or 5 at this point) things have turned the corner into an unexpected "chapter" or a new focus I didn't see coming. Lots of twists and turns.

It's an interesting exercise to think of stories and details that illustrate the ways this therapist has been really exceptionally good. I think some of it has come across the couple of times I've shared full session recaps, but I haven't done that in a while...

So much of it is about how conscientious yet authentic he is in the moment. So for example, in a recent session I abruptly had a very large realization about how I'd been strongly repressing a difficult feeling, in a way that ran very counter to my previous self-perception. We talked about it for several minutes, during which he sounded very measured and gentle, in response to my being pretty unnerved by what I had just figured out.

It then suddenly occurred to me that this situation might have been evident to him for ages, so I asked--and was surprised when he responded instantly with a very vehement and unusually loud "no, absolutely not!" while shaking his head and gesturing pretty emphatically. He explained that everything I was saying made sense to him, and mentioned some ways it linked to things he had noticed (some of which I've since realized might have been alluding to potential connections we've explored more since then, that I wasn't ready to fully absorb at the time but which I think he was laying some groundwork for), but that he hadn't had any more idea about the most shocking piece than I had. And he added that he knew what that experience of repressing emotion in that particular way was like, not just because it's one he's understood theoretically and seen in his patients, but because it's something he's done himself.

It's hard to describe how all of this played out exactly, but it was so clear while it was happening that he knew what he was doing, and was taking care to respond in a way that I'd find comforting in a difficult moment and useful in the long run, but was also very committed to being honest and human with me about it. He made it crystal clear that he was telling the truth and responding from a genuine place, in a way he knows is important to me, but also that he was taking responsibility for guiding the discussion if needed, in a way that would be therapeutically productive.