my first episode came even before I was diagnosed, and honestly, at the time, I had no idea what was going on.

all I remember is that I excused myself from a group of friends (we were having a sort of get together), and made my way out to the road



when ever I talk about my attempts, I always include that one as an actual attempt

but was it?. I don't know. at the time I didn't even know what I was doing (though somehow I did if that makes sense.)