Trigger - discussion of symptoms of outburst

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I have seen many specialists/psych/nurses. I was never really told what my diagnosis is with confidence. I was told Bi polar 2 possible, anxiety, PTSD. Here is a description of what I am dealing with. I feel like no one understands well enough to give me the right answer and I feel I can't properly treat/look for treatment w/o knowing what it is.

I am currently 12 weeks pregnant by IVF, and I went off all meds for my baby as soon as I found out I was pregnant. It was a risk, but I was worried about birth defects. Now that im nearing 2nd trimester, some of my symptoms are flaring. I tend to have triggers from stress. They will cause me to over react / act irrationally and it almost always starts the same way. It usually starts with crying / being upset about something not working out to plan. From there, I am in my head, I lose ability to reason, and then make the issue about something/one else fault and make it catastrophic end of the world (in hind sight it is always a small issue), make a big deal scream and yell, feel almost out of body, thrown things (usually my phone which I have no idea how it never broke yet) and hurt people (especially when they try to get away from me, I either freak out or I want them to go away if they try to help me). I have mildly hurt my husband before and myself in these "rages" when things were at their worst. Squeezing his arm too hard digging my nails into him, a punch or kick to get away. Throwing things which of course damages them/or the house. None of this is cool, totally violent and totally wrong. Sometimes / most of the time, when it was super bad, I didn't recall much from the episode. This hasn't happened in years, I thought I was cured of it!!

Fast forward to now > I had 2 similar episodes w/in the past week!! My husband is terrified as am I for my sanity and my babys health. Thankfully the baby is totally doing fine and I am a very diligent person with going to the Dr, calling my nurses etc. Im on the ball, I realize this needs to be addressed.

I feel its almost irresponsible that my recent psych nurse let me off my meds.

Hormones (before getting pregnant it was the time of month) seem to make it worse, pregnancy hormones are crazy. So, I am just not sure what this diagnosis is? I guess it feels like Hypomania, but it will last maybe 1-2 days max, (that I am aware of/notice) then there is a severe low of dealing with the repercussions and embarrassment of what I have done.

I don't want my baby to be exposed to this side of me if it can be helped. Being I was doing so well on Lamictal + Lexapro, I think that is what I need to go back on. I have an appt but not until 6/17th to see someone b/c im traveling over seas for a few weeks. I am bringing Benadryl. I have an appt to see my nurse tomorrow but she is afraid to treat pregnancy it seems so she referred me out.

I feel very lost and nervous. I talked to my OB nurse today who was surprised that I got off my meds. Clearly, that plan is not working.

So im curious what others think this could be other then Rage syndrome or Irrational tantrums to an extreme. Its mood issues for sure, my Dad has bad mood problems and displayed similar acts of aggression/anger on occasion growing up (never actually hurt us directly) and there is my mom with her insane anxiety. I think I have something going on. I would love to know what!

Thank you!!