I thought I was doing better. I look better, I talk better, I act better. But as of yesterday I am drinking a little(so far havent told H because he will freak) and not taking my meds after two months on them including one full month of perfect compliance at home. I feel like I cant tell anyone I am suffering because I dont feel like I am but I know something is wrong. My mouth feels sewn shut as far as reaching out for help or putting a pill in it. I havent slept as much the last couple of nights and I am being more social and active but thats what I am supposed to be doing! Driving is faster and music is much louder which maybe would be noticeable if there was someone who seen it. So Im probably not doing better but sure do look that way on the outside...

On the other hand Im not pi** drunk and trying to kill myself right at the moment so it isnt that bad hahaha