Thanks, luvyrself. It is a lot of "thinking out loud" that I do here. It means a lot to me that you find value in my posts. I'm not trying to present a problem for others to help me solve. I don't think there's much advice anyone can give me. I know my options. It helps to feel less alone by getting comments from others, even when they don't have neat answers to the dilemma of trying to manage a loved one's care with limited resources.

Your husband's leg vascular problems sound like a very worrisome situation. After 4 invasive procedures in one year, it doesn't sound like this is something his doctors have a secure handle on. The survival and functionality of a limb are at stake. Then there's pain to deal with as well. Vascular problems in the leg impact the health of heart, lungs and brain - all of which you know from the research you've been doing.

And research needs to be done for sure. It's not like doctors will sit you down and explain a whole lot in depth. Doctors really don't put a ton of effort into educating patients and families. They've changed from hiring nurses to hiring medical assistants (MA's) who are not qualified to do much teaching. You have to be online reading a good deal, if you want to have half a clue to what's going on.

I would like to have a blog. I tried to start one once and got completely lost.

Today I'm low. Our attendant quit. The work is getting harder with more lifting. I don't blame her. I barely can move my guy around from one room to another. However. even on a low day when I-m doing a half-hearted job, it's way better than he'ld be treated in any of the nursing homes he's been to. I'm tired. I have a dental issue I'm not addressing properly. Burn out is real and self-neglect goes with it.