Quote:
Originally Posted by Lrad123
I’m not sure about this. Are you saying that if I meet someone in my daily life who is kind, thoughtful and puts others first I can assume they were neglected as a child? Because those all seem like good qualities.
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Perhaps if someone was kind, thoughtful, and puts others first, and is also able to accept care and a reciprocal focus on his or herself, he or she MAY have had a "good enough" or appropriate childhood. I think the statement was also about having shame about needs and deflecting attention and care away from yourself so as not to be vulnerable. This is likely a form of control and self-protection. (Just some thoughts from someone who did not have a good enough childhood...)