Quote:
Originally Posted by Lrad123
Thanks for your thoughtful reply. I have really hard time with the word “neglect” because it feels like I’m playing the role of victim. When I look at my experiences with what Jonice Webb calls childhood emotional neglect, I clearly fit her criteria, but I also end up feeling like maybe I was just too sensitive and perhaps shouldn’t have had the response that I did especially since I’m not sure that my brother did.
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This sounds so similar to me. I am currently on a seemingly neverending quest to get some sort of helpful therapy and last week I met with a therapist who said that my parents not meeting my emotional needs was trauma (in response to my saying that I feel like I have no right to be depressed as nothing "bad" has ever happened to me).
I also have a really hard time with this and also am very uncomfortable with the word 'neglect' and its implications. My parents did the best they could and made huge sacrifices for me and my sisters and I don't want to start blaming them for something that was completely unintentional on their part (this is also complicated by the fact that I am still grieving for my Dad).
For me, I know that various factors from my childhood contributed to the way I am now and, while I think they are worth exploring (if I ever manage to get into therapy) I do not want to fall into the trap of just blaming all of my problems on the fact that my parents weren't perfect.