Dementia sufferers can't really be given attitude adjustments. Oh, I've tried. That's a sign of something wrong with me.

He doesn't even know, now, what upset me.

The help we had was through Medicaid. His income is small. If I had any hope of finding someone who could do what needs doing, I could probably squeeze out from his income enough for a few hours of help. I tried a number of people. They were just one problem after another.

I knew someone who had a great caregiver for her husband. The person couldn't speak English. I don't know if she even had papers, but she was fabulous.

I guess I gotta think outside the box.

He just needed an emergency shower, and there was no hot water. Pilot went out. Of all times for that to happen. I was forced to set depression aside for a while. Now he's all cleaned up and tucked in for the night. I have a sense of accomplishment, but I still feel pretty down.

I let dishes pile up, and now I dread tackling the kitchen. If I'ld just do it, I'ld feel better.

Maybe by tomorrow I'll feel better. Sometime just the passage of time gets rid of the demoralization.