And I remember that instead of watching NFL football (the Superbowl came on at about 4 AM on a Monday morning), we watched Sumo Wrestling at the bar. On Fridays, we would walk home (didn't want to drink and drive), stopping to get sushi then many times buying a beer from the vending machine a few steps from our rental house. The drinks seemed cool (the nonalcoholic) with things like melon fizz and iced coffee. We had a view of the Love Hotel Valley. Didn't go but it was obvious the rooms and hotels had various themes/crazy motifs. (Would be hesitant to sleep there.) Most had a garage next to the room so the car inside couldn't be seen.

Not sounding like a survivor of abuse in these posts but perhaps an occassional binge drinker? I stopped drinking after my attempt. It can feed your depression. Or perhaps it's the other way around?