Someone important to me is at his wit's end and I fear he may think suicide is the only way out. He did not have legal representation at the divorce (several years ago) and his wife was awarded child support & alimony. Kids are now adults and he's up to date on what he owes her. He served her papers because the alimony has no end date and he cannot afford it (he is blue collar, works hard but does not make a lot). Now the ex may try to get even more out of him (since he opened the door by filing against her) - she claims to be disabled and has signed over her home to their daughter so she can show very few assets.

It doesn't seem like there's a good outcome from this. He could try to cancel his action against her so she doesn't try to get more out of him, but then he's in the same boat he's been in plus he owes money to the lawyer. If she does try to get more out of him, I have some capacity ($) to try and help him fight it but I don't know if there's much chance things can get better, like getting the alimony stopped or reduced. It feels pretty hopeless. Yes, he made a big mistake in not having a lawyer when they divorced, but should he have to pay for a mistake like that for the rest of his life?

Does anyone have suggestions for a website where I could learn more about the legal process in situations like this?

Are there any men's advocacy organizations that can help?

I've been thinking about other ways that he might consider dealing with this. I think there would be some satisfaction if he could somehow get other people to see what an evil person she is - I believe she is just trying to make him as miserable as possible, she is trying to "win." I don't know if her family or community could have any sway with her, but if she were treated as the pariah that she deserves to be treated as, at least she would pay some sort of price for trying to destroy him. He's not perfect, but he tries very hard to do the right things. He does not deserve this. Maybe we could write a book about this or blog or something.

Thanks for listening.