Thank you to all your replies. I've brought some things up with my husband, and because it's his mother, that's the reply I get: it's just my mom, she doesn't mean anything by it. Basically it gets laughed off. I've had my say to him about THAT too, saying she's actually controlling in that way. And yes, she might be getting on a bit, age-wise, so age might also have something to do with it. Here I go again with making excuses for people -- my life story and up to me to change that tendency! I have also spoken to my children about this, as when she slapped my daughter's butt in public, I loudly said: "no, granny! We don't do that." And I pulled my daughter close to me and gave her a cuddle to make her feel better. My daughter was incredulous, she just kind of gave a little yelp and a look of WTF just happened here? So I'm glad I jumped in right away, and then when we were out of ear-shot of my Mother in law I told my children that NOBODY is EVER allowed to do that, even if it's your granny. THey got it, they said: yes, we don't know why she did that. Then they told their dad later on, who could only muster the words: oh, did she? And kind of laughed it off. So, it's up to me to be more serious about this. THANKFULLY she's NOT in the same country as us, and I said to my husband that I'm not having her stay with us for this long again, ever. She stayed with us for 3 months (.... no comment). Other than that she's actually a kind and caring person, so this weird freaky behaviour really juxtaposes it. 🤷*♀️