I want to say I REALLY like you how handled that moment with your daughter. That was very nicely done in a very difficult situation. I recommend explicitly discussing bodily autonomy with your children. That's good for all children. In some countries it is almost unheard of but there is a movement to start teaching young children about touch - okay touch and not okay touch and consent to touch etc. For example, even something as simple as a tickling game can unwittingly send a message to a child that they do not have bodily autonomy. They say stop tickling and sometimes the parent (or sibling) continues. Nobody means any harm in that scenario but it's a dangerous message. My sister-in-law taught my young niece all about bodily autonomy. She also knows about pedophilia and the importance of protecting herself and telling her parents if she experiences unwanted touch of any sort. She is 11.

I am sorry your husband was not helpful with the mother issue. This is quite a common phenomenon. I don't understand it but a lot of grown men will not draw lines with their mothers for any reason. My ex was like that with his mother. I won't comment further on that issue because I think that may warrant some counseling perhaps from a therapist...in order to work through.

Three months! Incredible. Is it over now? I hope so. You sound like a very loving mother and wife so give yourself some credit Peace to you.