Let me start by saying my husband is and always has been very supportive of me being in therapy. When I want to quit due to financial reason he adimately refuses because he knows I am doing it strictly for financial reasons. So this isn't about him not being supportive but just not understanding it.

One of my issues is that I don't allow myself to cry often and when I do it is short lived. This partially is because all my life people have said don't cry and I know it makes people uncomfortable. My husband hates to see me cry and is very protective of me my 2 sons are the same way.

With the anniversary of Ts death this weekend I was a little emotional yesterday. At two different times last night I had reminders of T. Once when hubby told me I should pick lilacs from my bush for the table. This is the first year that I have more than 3 flowers (about 50). While doing so I remembered at our last appointment T gave me a vase of lilacs from her home as she knew how much I love them. I started to cry a little. When I told hubby he was upset with himself for recommending sonething painful. I explained it was okay and good to cry some.

A few minutes later I did something that reminded me of T and again started to cry. Hubby became visibly frustrated so I stopped again and explained it was a good thing.

It is going to be a long weekend.