I had a few IP stays that the IP Pdoc really had issue with my Xanax use citing all these studies.

About 3 years ago I was IP and my Fibro flared so bad I was going out of my mind in pain I could barely breathe the weekend on call Pdoc saw me and told me he would treat my pain right away if I agreed to detox off Xanax , nothing made sense to me , I was sobbing in pain, apparently at some point I agreed.

I woke up almost 48 hours later had no idea who I was or where I was. I couldn’t stand up, I felt like dying. My nurse that has been there forever sat with me and helped explain to me what happened and I still just could not wrap my head around it. She kept telling me to call my husband. I told her I wasn’t married. Yes I was that bad.

He detoxed me using phenobarbital.

So I’m back home and my anxiety is just getting worse and worse. I was giving anything non benzo a real go , I was desperate for something non benzo to work. I was terrified of going back on one for fear of ever having to go back through a detox ever again.

Finally my Pdoc and T and I sat down and they both said they wanted me back on Xanax or Valium. At this point I had been out of the hospital about 4 months. I had zero quality of life, I was in tears constantly, never really able to take a deep breath, I was sleeping a handful of hours at most each week.

So I got my life back. One day my Pdoc will retire and I’ll get a new “Dr Graves” and he /she might be a pill Nazi and demand I get off them?? But until that happens I try not to think about it much. I have severe ptsd over that whole detox it’s not funny.

My Pdoc and T actually sent a letter to Vanderbilt about the ptsd trauma that the detox caused.

I have wound up back there IP numerous times since and that guy is still there but he will never be my Doctor again.. I won’t even look his way because I still want to slap his face off ... I always get my same Pdoc and she’s a wonderful young woman.

Sorry this turned into a novel but it’s just what I went through.

My Pdoc feels that AP’s can cause as many long term effects as benzo can.